In case you've missed it, Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton will begin campaigning together in itsy bitsy Unity, New Hampshire on Friday. Get it, "Unity?" You see, they are promoting this unity idea, and if they do it in Unity, you'll get this whole "unity" message. Appearances in, say, Dayton or San Antonio could send us all right off-message, perhaps never to return. We're all daft enough it seems that the two appearing with each other on the campaign trail isn't clear enough. We need blunt metaphor, sold as the soul of wit itself. Some power tie-wearing consultant was just paid about $50K out of that big corporate money Obama's been raising for coming up with that one.
I would suggest a few other town names for 2008 politicians to campaign in.
How about Truth or Consequences, New Mexico?
How about Obama begins in Mars, Pennsylvania and Hillary in Venus, Pennsylvania, and they meet somewhere in the middle? Because, as we all know from the old cliche, winners are from Mars and losers are from Venus.
While in the Keystone State, Bill and Hillary could continue to avoid Intercourse, but Bill could always continue alone to to his old stomping grounds of Moreheadsville, seeing as Hillary already sent him to Reamstown.
You get the idea. Since both have been generally supportive of NAFTA, maybe they should visit our Rust Belt jobs in Mexico. Or, here's an idea, how about dropping by Falluja?