Fight cabin fever and seasonal affective disorder with booze and trivia!

Sunday, February 3, as soon as the Super Bowl ends (9:30pm..?)
Lyon's Den
2nd & Christian Sts.
Subject Round: FOOTBALL

Tuesday, February 5, 9pm
Ray's Happy Birthday Bar
1200 E. Passyunk Ave.
(near 9th & Federal Sts.)
Subject Round: THE AMERICAN SOUTH

Wednesday, February 6, 9pm
Dirty Frank's
13th & Pine Sts.
Subject Round: TURNING JAPANESE (I REALLY THINK SO)

This week's Secret Theme rounds

Each group of 10 otherwise unrelated tough questions has a theme running through its answers. Can you answer the questions and figure out the themes? Answers will be posted early next week.

Ray's Happy Birthday Bar:

1) What ridiculous Scientology "process", usually consisting of pointing at or touching someone in pain or distress, supposedly helps the victim?
2) What Shakespeare character is also known as Robin Goodfellow?
3) What 1995-96 Brit-com, shown more recently in the US on PBS, featured Rowan Atkinson as a cop?
4) What 2006 gymnastics movie from the people who brought us the Bring It On! series of cheerleading movies features Jeff Bridges and a cast of relative unknowns?
5) What fictional substance did Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. create for "Cat's Cradle"?
6) What successful company, established in Los Gatos, California in 1997, reportedly has an annual postage bill of $300 million?
7) What influential Jewish-American newspaper has been published in New York since 1897, originally in Yiddish but now primarily in English?
8) Name the park laid out by William Penn in his plan for Philadelphia where City Hall now stands.
9) What early American auto manufacturer produced a model called the Rocket, which set the world land speed record in 1906 (127.7 mph!)?
10) What 1997 big-budget Hollywood film was directed by John Woo?

... and what theme links the 10 answers?

Dirty Frank's:

1) What French liqueur, distilled with over 130 herbal extractions, has been produced by the Carthusian monks of the town of Voiron since 1605?
2) What 19th century actor, arguably the most famous American actor of the century, hailed from Philadelphia?
3) What 2003 film featured Heath Ledger and Orlando Bloom?
4) What do we better know calcium oxide as?
5) What's the nickname of the F/A-18 fighter jet?
6) What's Pat Buchanan's similarly conservative sister's name?
7) Saturday Night Live writer Walter Williams created a wildly popular character which appeared on the show over 20 times 1978-1980; name the character.
8) What Fox Network show, on air 1994-2000, followed the story of the Salinger family?
9) In the US we live in a "state", in Canada in a "province." What is one called in Germany?
10) What world-famous rock band released their first single in 1981 on a label called Hib-Tone? That label never released another record.

... and what theme links the 10 answers?

Rice = life, vocabulary = more smartestness

In addition to being my favorite grain - Chinese, Vietnamese, Indian and Mexican being my favorite cuisines - rice is literally vital. Its calories and nutrients can mean life or death for hundreds of millions. Consider clicking on this website a few times now and again to test your vocabulary and feed people in bad situations the world over. This is the best use for advertising and quizzing, especially on the web, I've ever seen.

Quizmaster Chris' Super Bowl pick

You read it here first! New England 27, New York 17. Patriots continue dynasty, Giants cover the spread.

Kenyan police snap into action

If you've been paying attention to the international news the past couple of weeks, you're well aware that questionable election results (not that this sort of thing happens here, oh no...) have resulted in waves of political violence which have killed about a thousand people and counting.

The latest victim appears to be Orange Democratic Movement (ODM) member of parliament Melitus Were, who was shot twice in the head outside of his home. That's shot ... in the head... twice.

Quoth law enforcement: "Initial investigations indicate this was a case of murder," police spokesman Eric Kiraithe said.

ODM spokesman Tony Gachoka said ..."We want no stone unturned in the investigation, but we suspect foul play."

Once again: shot... twice ...in the head ... I, too, expect that foul play might have been involved, although I am not an expert.

Answers to last week's Secret Theme rounds

Ray's Happy Birthday Bar:

The theme was California counties.

1) What's the Spanish word for "monkey"? (el) Mono / Mono
2) What Prussian linguist and political philosopher wrote a defense of the Enlightenment in 1810 titled On the Limits of State Action? Friedrich (Wilhelm) von Humboldt / Humboldt
3) What NHL team did Wayne Gretzky play for 1988-1996? Los Angeles Kings / both Los Angeles and Kings
4) At what Swiss immigrant's homestead was gold discovered in California in 1848, igniting the California Gold Rush? John Sutter of Sutter's Mill fame / Sutter
5) What Hollywood starlet, who drank herself to death prematurely, apparently had her ashes turn up in a New York antique store in 2004? Veronica Lake / Lake
6) The recipe for what retro luncheon staple calls for crab meat, mayonnaise, Worcestershire sauce, and frequently butter and/or bread? Crab Imperial / Imperial
7) What venerable learning institution was founded in Dublin, Ireland in 1592? Trinity College / Trinity
8) Who has a bestseller with An Inconvenient Book? Glenn Beck / Glenn
9) What model of Cadillac is named after a Latin American legend which dates to the 1530s? El Dorado / El Dorado
10) What soft drink brand was founded in Baltimore in 1889 and purchased by Sara Lee in the 1980s? Shasta / Shasta

Dirty Frank's:

The theme was politicians.


1) CLEAR SERPENT = Arlen Specter
2) THRONE JEST = John Street
3) ADRENAL GROAN = Ronald Reagan
4) PLAN HARDER = Ralph Nader
5) UNETHICAL TERM = Michael Nutter
6) NEEDY CHICK = Dick Cheney
7) WHOSE BUGGER = George W. Bush
8) PILLOW CLONE = Colin Powell
9) LED LENDER = Ed Rendell
10) ORAL PUN = Ron Paul

Play the inaugural Lyon's Den pub quiz immediately following the Super Bowl!

Sunday, February 3, as soon as the Super Bowl ends (9:30pm..?)
Lyon's Den
848 S. 2nd St.
(near 2nd & Christian Sts.)
Subject Round: FOOTBALL

Lyon's Den has retained me to begin hosting quizzo at their location, likely on Sunday nights. On somewhat short notice they've decided to kick it off immediately following the Super Bowl. That would likely be in the neighborhood of 9:30. I'm aiming to get people out by 11; in future I'm going to suggest the Sunday night game to start at 8 or so.

The Subject round will be Football - what else could it be? The other five rounds will not be football-related.

If you've never been, Lyon's Den has a bar menu, pool table and a few largish TVs. The place is under new management and is trying to attract an expanded clientele, one that might be interested in things like a pub quiz. There are much worse places to watch the Super Bowl and Tom Petty.

Pearls of Wisdom prove beyond any reasonable doubt that they are the smartestest employees at Hamilton Jewelers

There are a few scientifically acceptable ways for the modern manager to compare the intelligence and world-awareness of employees. Most of the better methods were banned in the most recent round of Geneva Conventions and would bring Amnesty International down on you pretty hard, but among those remaining I'd say that hiring me to run a quiz at your event is as accurate as it gets. Note that even team names can tell management a lot about what you're working with in terms of human clay. The team that inappropriately named themselves Winners for example are clearly "incompetent and unaware", whereas Basement Dwellers, painfully aware of their limitations, are humbly fit for trainable rote tasks, and apparently amenable to them. Work assignments are so much easier to distribute post-quiz!Pearls of Wisdom (pictured) edged out Best Directors - thus necessitating a management coup in this quizmaster's opinion - for the win at the annual Hamilton holiday bash, held in the posh surroundings of the Jasna Polana golf club in Princeton, New Jersey. Jasna Polana (means "bright meadow" in Polish) was the former Johnson & Johnson heir's estate, renamed by Barbara Piasecka Johnson (means "Anna Nicole Smith" in Polish).

Hopefully Hamilton's staff had as pleasant a time as I did. Anyone who wants to bring me over to their organization for a little intramural trivia smackdown can do so easily by using the contact info at right.

The teams were huge by bar standards, roughly ten people in each. Your scores:

Beautiful Gold: Pearls of Wisdom 133
So-So Silver: Best Directors 129
Shameful, Shameful Bronze: L'ville Rockers 124

Also-rans:

Winners 114
We Be Cool 104
Table of Ten 95
B*****s 90
Red Hot Red Bank Babes and Rick 89
Team Awesome 82
Barking Spiders 79
Name: Team 54
Basement Dwellers 53

Two weeks' standings from Ray's Happy Birthday Bar

It's good to see the momentum we'd built before the holidays gear up again. Will Kisses for Kittens ever win again? One can only hope.

Last week first:

Beautiful Gold: Zeronimo! 91
So-So Silver: Cosine of 4-3 79
Shameful, Shameful Bronze: Edward James Almost 70

This week:

Beautiful Gold: Your Hottest Friend 119
So-So Silver: Kisses for Kittens! 107
Shameful, Shameful Bronze: LaLa 56

THREE upcoming quizzes!

I'm getting in an early plug for the kick-off (get it???) of the Lyon's Den quiz, post-Super Bowl.

Tuesday, January 29, 9pm
Ray's Happy Birthday Bar
1200 E. Passyunk Ave.
(near 9th & Federal Sts.)
Subject Round: SIT-COMS

Wednesday, January 30, 9pm
Dirty Frank's
13th & Pine Sts.
Subject Round: PHILADELPHIA HISTORY

Sunday, February 3, as soon as the Super Bowl ends (9:30pm..?)
Lyon's Den
2nd & Christian Sts.
Subject Round: FOOTBALL

Album art... extended

This thread is one of the funnier Photoshopping contests I've seen. The concept here was for the contestants to impress each other with images of what we didn't know was going on just beyond the bounds of the cover art that we've known for all these years. The best entries seem to be the ones that stuck closest to the concept, instead of merely changing the art however they felt.

You can thank WFMU's Beware of the Blog for making me, hence you, aware of this thread. FARK.com tends to have a couple of Photoshopping contests per day; if you like visual puns and aren't averse to juvenile humor, these can be a riot.

Group W remains undefeated in 2008; W has won 7 straight, has not been part of a losing effort since Thanksgiving

The night before Thanksgiving 2007, Group W finished fourth, and only two points ahead of fifth. The next week they teamed up with part of Sofa Kingdom to form the Gofa Wingdom superteam and won. Since then they've won seven in a row. This is becoming absurd.

Two weeks ago Lil' Roy Screamed was leading after five rounds and looked poised to end the streak. I marked Roy's paper incorrectly, accidently cheating them out of 6 points, with W pulling ahead by 6 in the final round. Jim from Roy caught my mistake, which put the teams in a tie.

My tiebreaker was to guess the height of San Francisco's Transamerica Pyramid, the tallest building in that city, in feet. The closest team would win. Roy went with 985' and W with 975'. The precise measurement is 853'. Thus W continued the streak by a lousy 10 feet.

This week I thought I'd knock W down a bit with a round of Asian Cuisine questions in the Subject round. Not only did a couple of Sofa Kingdom players join W for the game, but a Kingdom girlfriend who is Asian-American played with them as well. W and Roy tied for the best scores that round with 8 of 10, and Group W cruised to another win overall.

Can anyone out there take them down..?

Your scores from the past two weeks at Dirty Frank's, starting with last week:

Beautiful Gold: Group W 138 (OT)
So-So Silver: What's in a Name (a.k.a. Lil' Roy Screamed) 137 (OT)
Shameful, Shameful Bronze: Don Quizzote y Sancho Anza 123

Also-rans:

Cum Juicey 105
Fantasy 103
Miller Low Lives 83
Hot Cops 82

This week...

Beautiful Gold: Group W 169
So-So Silver: Lil' Roy Screamed 155
Shameful, Shameful Bronze: Sir Chomps-a-Lot 146

Also-rans:

Blind Moose 122
Don Quizzote y Sancho Anza 103
Fantasy 102
Tass & Itties 86
I Has About 80
Clones* 18
Battle* 2

* team quit

Jim Henson's psychedelic "Limbo" ... on Johnny Carson!

For a short stretch there in late '60s and early '70s, the civilized tribes crashed the barbarians' gates on TV and radio, and real capital-A Art squeezed into mainstream entertainment in a way that rarely happens now. Forgive Carson the "Jim Jensen" intro here; the man gave a pretty open platform to some real entertainers and thought-provoking guests from time to time, and I can respect that. This clip is from 1974.

I loved The Muppet Show as kid, but if you ever get to see Henson's student films or his work on the very first episode of Saturday Night Live - the stuff meant for adults - do yourself a favor and watch it.

This week's Secret Theme rounds, including the infamous Dirty Frank's anagram round

If you don't hush up, these spies'll get ya!

This week I had a standard Secret Theme round at Ray's and something a little different at Frank's. This is how a standard Secret Theme round works, as I copy and paste about once/week: Each group of 10 otherwise unrelated tough questions has a theme running through its answers. Can you answer the questions and figure out the themes? Answers will be posted early next week. And they will be, as always.

Ray's Happy Birthday Bar:

1) What's the Spanish word for "monkey"?
2) What Prussian linguist and political philosopher wrote a defense of the Enlightenment in 1810 titled On the Limits of State Action?
3) What NHL team did Wayne Gretzky play for 1988-1996?
4) At what Swiss immigrant's homestead was gold discovered in California in 1848, igniting the California Gold Rush?
5) What Hollywood starlet, who drank herself to death prematurely, apparently had her ashes turn up in a New York antique store in 2004?
6) The recipe for what retro luncheon staple calls for crab meat, mayonnaise, Worcestershire sauce, and frequently butter and/or bread?
7) What venerable learning institution was founded in Dublin, Ireland in 1592?
8) Who has a bestseller with An Inconvenient Book?
9) What model of Cadillac is named after a Latin American legend which dates to the 1530s?
10) What soft drink brand was founded in Baltimore in 1889 and purchased by Sara Lee in the 1980s?

... and what theme links the ten answers?

At Frank's I mixed it up a little, seeing as I'm coming down with a cold (I feel better today than yesterday, thanks for asking) and wasn't sure how much talking I'd want to do. Actually, I was sure how much: I didn't want to do any talking. But that makes for a rotten quiz. So I threw together a printed round of 10 anagrams, and noted that the theme running through the ten was that they were names of people who had something in common. You got five points as always per correct answer, plus the usual eight bonus points for the theme. Note that although all of these names are broken into two words, they aren't all two-word names (most are), and letters from the first word do appear in the last name and vice versa.

Dirty Frank's:

1) CLEAR SERPENT
2) THRONE JEST
3) ADRENAL GROAN
4) PLAN HARDER
5) UNETHICAL TERM
6) NEEDY CHICK
7) WHOSE BUGGER
8) PILLOW CLONE
9) LED LENDER
10) ORAL PUN

... and what theme links the ten names?

'The Office' poll results; new poll posted

To my surprise, more people liked the American version of The Office, by a count of 4-3. One person liked the two equally, and no one voted the option of disliking both. Eight votes isn't bad; we're moving in the right direction on participation in these things. We're only about 6 votes short of being the Wyoming Caucus, and that gets national media attention.

The new poll, posted at right, simply asks how frequently you visit this blog.

Solutions to last week's Secret Theme rounds

Ray's Happy Birthday Bar:

You should be embarrassed if you got this one correct; the theme was things or people mentioned in the Billy Joel song "We Didn't Start the Fire." Weird song. I always thought it was a strange way to abdicate responsibility. "Not starting the fire" is not a good rationale for not putting it out. Even more bizarre is the fact that a number of the items listed in the second half of the song darn well were the fault of people Billy Joel's age, although not necessarily that of the pop radio audience at which it was aimed.

1) What 1956 bestseller by Grace Metalious shocked many American sensibilities? Peyton Place
2) What world leader survived a 1957 assassination attempt aboard a private jet, the Kashmir Princess? Chou En-Lai
3) What spree killer inspired the Bruce Springsteen song "Nebraska", as well as a number of movies, including Natural Born Killers and Badlands? Charles Starkweather
4) What movie won 11 Academy Awards in 1959? Ben-Hur
5) What Nazi war criminal was captured by the Mossad in Argentina in 1961? Adolf Eichmann
6) In 1983 America finally put its first woman in space, what's her name? Sally Ride
7) "Colonel Reb" is the mascot of what university's sports teams? University of Mississippi, a.k.a. Ole Miss... would you believe that the model for Colonel Reb was a real-life black man? It's true!
8) What 20th century US president switched major party affiliation only 17 years before getting elected president as a member of the second party? Ronald Reagan
9) What boxer knocked out Floyd Patterson in 1962 to become world heavyweight champion? Sonny Liston
10) What American company started as a mining wagon manufacturer in 1852, started producing cars in 1902, and eventually went out of the auto business in 1966? Studebaker

Dirty Frank's:

For the first time in a number of weeks, three teams correctly identified the theme at Frank's. We were stuck on two for quite some time. It was Charlies.

1) What classic work of erotica by Cheikh Hefzaoui was first translated into English in 1886 by Sir Richard Burton? The Perfumed Garden / Charlie perfume
2) What's the only Ivy League university founded by Baptists? It was founded in 1764 and is the seventh oldest university in the US. Brown / Charlie Brown
3) What's the only movie Rob Reiner directed in 2007? The Bucket List / Charlie Bucket
4) What event did sportscaster Keith Jackson call "The Grandaddy of Them All"? The Rose Bowl / Charlie Rose
5) What 1992 movie featured Robert Downey Jr., Marisa Tomei, Anthony Hopkins and Dan Akroyd? Chaplin
6) At what event on June 9, 1954 did Joseph Welch speak the famous quotation "Let us not assassinate this lad further, Senator. ... You've done enough. Have you no sense of decency, sir? At long last, have you no sense of decency?" Army-McCarthy Hearings / Charlie McCarthy
7) What popular brand of liquor was founded in 1875 and owned by the Brown-Forman Company since 1957? Jack Daniel's / Charlie Daniels
8) What 20th century president had a wife die while in office, and also remarried while in office? Woodrow Wilson / Charlie Wilson's War
9) What 1975 dance craze got a huge boost by a song of the same title by Van McCoy & the Soul City Symphony? The Hustle / Charlie Hustle was Pete Rose's nickname
10) What is NFL coach Bill Parcell's nickname? The (Big) Tuna / Charlie the Tuna